The simple things that don’t effect life much remind me of you. Every time a car passes my street with loud music, I think it’s you, coming to surprise me. When I eat quesadillas, I think about how you had your first chicken quesadilla at chewys with me in 2014. I even think of you when I look at myself in the morning because you were the first to kiss me when I was not hidden under makeup. You’re everywhere except here with me, sitting next to me where you belong.
It’s never going to stop. The name calling, the self harm, the bad thoughts, the depressed moods. Nothing is ever going to change. There’s no point if nothing changes, and nothing has changed.